Saturday, January 8, 2011

Bitten ( A work in progress)

Alright, here's six sentences from my work in progress, Bitten. It's still very rough around the edges and I went over six sentences to capture the mood of the scene. In my story, Mario is a new vampire in Aurora, the vampire queen's, territory. While she tries to decide what to do with this newbie, a mystery unfolds that could claim her life and upset the balance of the vampire race...

Aurora took a step toward him. Her guards flinched at the expression of rage that was etched on her face but Mario didn’t. They released his arms. Mario crossed them over his chest as he watched her with amusement. She swallowed but wasn’t about to back down.
“Right now, I don’t give a damn what your name is. You took a human in her throat and almost drained her! If a slayer saw that, you wouldn’t be standing here right now. And who do you think you are, opening up a channel so that I could watch such an atrocity!”
“It made you wet, didn’t it?”

Please comment to let me know what you think of it so far.

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